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Post by Remove on Jul 23, 2010 19:12:09 GMT -5
So, i'm 16.....and I don't see the allure. I mean, I "can" date now...but whats the point ? I mean, any guy that I would actually see marrying materiel would leave on his mission soon anyway.
And my ward has.....4 ym over 16. 1 who's 17, and I am not dating him were to friendly and i don't want anything awkward. And then theres 3 who are going on missions, 1 being brother and the other 2 being huge tools.
So, I suppose when theres 20 ym in your ward its different.
And what about dating non members? Do you? I've thought about it, but I don't want to date non members, because temple marriage is my ultimate goal and I don't want to get off track.
Thoughts?
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Post by Michael on Jul 23, 2010 23:41:05 GMT -5
Meet guys from dances?, that all I can say.. I'm not much of help.. I'm 17 been on one date and then Aubrey (My date) quit talking to me like everyone else (not on dates but you know)
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Post by Jayda on Jul 24, 2010 10:43:08 GMT -5
I don't really recommend dating a non-member if you ultimate goal is Temple marriage. I mean, maybe you can help convert someone by dating them. But they shouldn't be joining the church for the wrong reason, which would be you. However, it is a case by case issue. I have friends who only date non-members. I don't think I would, though.
If you don't see the appeal then I wouldn't date unless you're asked on a date. I generally only like dating the guy that I like, even if we aren't in a committed relationship. I've been on a few dates since last year with a few different guys and it can make things complicated and confusing.
So I'm not entirely sure. If you don't feel like you should, or if you don't want to, then don't. Simple as that. I know people who didn't start dating until college because there was "no point" other then to get to know people.
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Post by shadow on Jul 24, 2010 14:04:36 GMT -5
Yeah i agree with Jayda, a friend of mine who is a RM heard of a guy who joined the church because of his girlfriend, when his girlfriend told him that she didnt want to marry him unless he went on a mission he decided to go on one. After a few weeks he said it was too hard and broke every rule in the white book.
On another point however, dating as a teen isnt supposed to be to find a spouse, its to develop friends and to find qualities that you would want in a future spouse so you know what to look for. Thats why the church says to avoid steady relationships untill your an adult. however you dont have to date, ive only been on 2 real dates and some RM friends of mine never dated because there was no one to date. it doesnt matter if you do or dont
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Post by hockeydude on Jul 24, 2010 16:17:30 GMT -5
I like the thought but I think you're thinking too far ahead. For you right now, dating is for having fun and figuring out what you like. You'll find out through group dates this early that there are things you really like in people and things you can't stand. Those things you figure out are what you'll look for in a spouse later.
I'm 18, and serious dating hasn't started for me. If a girl knows my views on dating I will go on a date, even if I'm not all that interested. Through doing so I've figured out so many things that I A) will seek out in my future lady and B) will avoid in my future lady. You don't realize it until you get out there, so that's the purpose of dating for you right now.
As for non-members, I say go for it. I've dated non-member girls, but after making sure they understood that we weren't becoming a couple after a date or married for that matter. There are plenty of good people that aren't members, so don't limit yourself. You can worry about marriage later on, like in college.
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Post by Remove on Jul 24, 2010 16:29:05 GMT -5
Lds people see dating so different then non members. A lot of non members have the one actual date means there "going out" or "dating." Which, i don't think is true. A guy can ask a new girl out every week and LDS people don't rrly see anything wrong with it. while a non member would think "Wow, what a player."
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Post by Erik Slack on Jul 24, 2010 20:31:31 GMT -5
From my own experience, dating can be really fun! If you're not interested, well that's okay too, but you'll definitely miss out on some fun and even life-altering experiences. Every person I've ever become friends with has changed my life in one way or another, and mostly for the good.
I've dated members and non-members alike. I found that either kind of date could be just as enjoyable and safe depending entirely upon my attitude and who I chose to go with.
I agree with Eric, who wears his name with great aplomb, you shouldn't limit yourself to members-only. Do not under-estimate the things you can learn from people who are not members of God's church. There is a lot of good out their, and you can be confident that the Holy Ghost will help you sort it out from the bad.
Always do your best to honor your baptismal covenants. Then go mingle with the world! If you do then you will become an unstoppable force for good!
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