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Post by hockeydude on Jan 18, 2010 23:37:09 GMT -5
I know I keep saying this type of thing won't happen again but it always does. I apologize. Anyway, after kind of just talking about it at a stake event I hung out with some of my friends: two guys from my ward and two girls from another named Lindsey and Hayley. Hayley just moved in this August and I thought she was pretty cute so I got to know her and I now do quite well. So anyway at this party we stopped at her house for a bit until we were ready and moved on to sledding and skating. The whole time I was being kind of flirty, but it felt in place because it seemed like she was doing the same. She would laugh at like everything I said, kept like bumping or nudging me, and when we were sledding she'd like grab my hand or lock arms and be like," Let's make a chain, Eric!" So I thought, wow, you know, something might be happening here. Then when we went ice skating she heard I was good at skating (12th in the country thankyaverymuch, even though I didn't bring it up ) so she's like," Eric you have to teach me!" And she kept wanting me to lean on me and spin her since she was new to skating and I was thinking she must like me at least a bit. From there I left to train with my inline team in the arena where the Vikings play, and I got a text when I was walking out. Here's the convo between me and one of the friends who was at the party. Him: "Okay dude so I was talking to Lindsey and I'm pretty sure Hayley knows you like her." Me: "Hm. Well it pretty much just sparked today but I'm alright with her knowing I guess." Him: "It just happened today?" Me: "Yeah, why?" Him: "Well Lindsey said you creeped Hayley out at the dance. She felt like you were stalking her or something." (Which, in retrospect, I can see how she would think that. I was around her a lot that night, but it's because she was around a lot of my friends too. Or if I would try to find a new group she'd be there. So I can see both.) Which completely changed my perspective on this whole thing. I was immediately convinced that she was just being nice and kind of worried that I'd creeped on her again tonight, because once again I gave her a lot of attention. But when I thought about it again I only did those things because of what she did that I wrote above. And at this stake event not only did I give her distance but she came up and hugged me right before the thing was over. So I have no idea what to believe.
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Post by Jayda on Jan 18, 2010 23:41:28 GMT -5
Hmmm... I wouldn't know what to believe, either. Honestly, I'd say don't believe what your friends told you until you hear it from Hayley's mouth. I've had SO many experiences where my friends said one thing and I was told another, or it got mixed up, or my friends lied to me so I'd do something they wanted me to do, etc. If you want, you can ask Hayley. But I don't recommend it if you don't totally know her. The other way to handle this is to back off a little and see if she comes around. Don't back off too much (you want to keep her friendship, of course) but see if she wants to be with you or if you really were "stalking" her, that sort of thing. I hope it works out for you!
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Post by Sayari's other half on Jan 19, 2010 9:54:04 GMT -5
Ahh Eric,we love you,you're amazing and you always have problems..poor boy. I would just be nice and normal to her and see what happens.Not overly pay any attention but not completely ignore her.Maybe you just misunderstood each other! IF it's still weird then I would just casually bring it up that 'I' if I were you,didn't mean anything by it and that was just the impression I got.
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Post by hockeydude on Jan 19, 2010 17:15:16 GMT -5
I was actually thinking the same thing Jayda. I think whatever the next stake event is I'm just going to step back a bit and see what happens. Not like avoid her but I think you know what I mean. The last time I gave her space without even thinking about it she found me, and that was after the dance, so I'll consider this round two. I thought about if it was a false message too. It would in one way make sense because the same friend likes her too and Lindsey, who told him, likes me. So in that way it would make sense. But they're also both very trustworthy and I'd be shocked if they lied to me about something like that. And Erin I understand your point but it honestly doesn't take effort. Creeping is like the last thing I do which is why I think that hit me pretty hard. But yesterday she was always just in a close proximity to me, even when I was like planning out a solo hill-jump or something. It still comes out the same way. Whether I did it intentionally or not I was by her like all day. So my effort might be to not be by her all the time. We'll see. And coming back to you Jayda. I haven't known her for that long, so while I can talk pretty comfortably with her about most things I think asking directly is a little out of the way for now. Especially if she really does think I'm a creeper. Thank you very much for the advice by the way, both of you!
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Post by ldsgirl Aka Sayari on Jan 20, 2010 0:20:29 GMT -5
I can't see you as a stalker either. Your friends might have misinterpreted the situation because of their own personal emotional mind-set! I would agree with stepping back a little and giving Hayley a little more space and seeing what her response is. Let her take the lead for a time and be friendly, but not clingy and see how it goes!
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Post by Sayari's other half on Jan 20, 2010 7:10:19 GMT -5
I'm just finding it a bit strange that she feels you were 'stalking' her,but she goes to find you? But anyway you're welcome and I hope it works out ^_^
OR maybe she likes you,but was unsure because of all the attention?..I'm not going to sit and puzzle out this childs mind..
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Post by hockeydude on Feb 21, 2010 1:01:46 GMT -5
Okay so today was the first time I got to kind of "touch-up" on this situation. We rented out a YMCA for an activity and I had the thought "give her space" glued in my mind. I'm not positive what to think yet still so I'd appreciate opinions: (but don't feel pressured. I have a hard time being concise ) -------------------- So the beginning. We all meet in a lounge and I start talking with my buddy Josh who is probably the one she'd be interested in if not me. She wasn't there yet. All of a sudden I feel someone lightly pushing me in the back and I turn around and it's her. I made some small comments and laughter but I kept it brief. I can honestly say I pretended to be more interested in Josh and mine's conversation. So continuing off the experiment, when everyone went to the pool I asked permission to stay back and watch the Olympics (which I honestly wanted to do), and after I saw my event I went in the pool. I'd say I was only even around her in the pool like 15-20% of the time we were there. She was around Josh a lot more. I left the pool before she did and probably didn't see her for like 45 minutes/an hour after that. The whole day was just feeling so unnatural. I walked into the gym when they were explaining this dodgeball/tag game (a guy in the middle tries to throw and hit people running in a circle around the gym. If someone gets hit they go to the middle). I was waiting for the game to start when Hayley pulled my shirt and asked me to explain the game to her. So after I did and the game started she got out and was targetting me like the whole time. We played kickball after and were on opposite teams, so less actual contact there. But I was second base and whenever she was there she'd jokingly stick her tongue out at me or shove me or something. I kind of stopped caring about the space thing at this point. So then the event was done and Josh, me, and some other friends start kicking a ball around. So right as I'm passing to someone Hayley like jumps in front of me and pretty much tackles me, to an extent where we both went to the floor. There was some small talk there with my whole motive down the drain, and after a goodbye hug she's like," I'll call you, we should hang out." ------------ So I feel like I did my part and things worked out. Things were kind of awkward for the first 2-3 hours but that might've been because of me. I don't know. I just know by the end of the day things felt right.
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Post by Michael on Feb 21, 2010 13:30:51 GMT -5
Uhhh... I'm not sure what to say Maybe she's the kind of girl that "needs" a lot of guys around her... you said she talked to Josh?... for a hour or something like that.. then she came and hung out with you? for the rest of the time. I'm not sure what to say.. sorry lol I'm not help at all
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Post by ldsgirl Aka Sayari on Feb 22, 2010 9:45:05 GMT -5
Okay so today was the first time I got to kind of "touch-up" on this situation. We rented out a YMCA for an activity and I had the thought "give her space" glued in my mind. I'm not positive what to think yet still so I'd appreciate opinions: (but don't feel pressured. I have a hard time being concise ) -------------------- So the beginning. We all meet in a lounge and I start talking with my buddy Josh who is probably the one she'd be interested in if not me. She wasn't there yet. All of a sudden I feel someone lightly pushing me in the back and I turn around and it's her. I made some small comments and laughter but I kept it brief. I can honestly say I pretended to be more interested in Josh and mine's conversation. So continuing off the experiment, when everyone went to the pool I asked permission to stay back and watch the Olympics (which I honestly wanted to do), and after I saw my event I went in the pool. I'd say I was only even around her in the pool like 15-20% of the time we were there. She was around Josh a lot more. I left the pool before she did and probably didn't see her for like 45 minutes/an hour after that. The whole day was just feeling so unnatural. I walked into the gym when they were explaining this dodgeball/tag game (a guy in the middle tries to throw and hit people running in a circle around the gym. If someone gets hit they go to the middle). I was waiting for the game to start when Hayley pulled my shirt and asked me to explain the game to her. So after I did and the game started she got out and was targetting me like the whole time. We played kickball after and were on opposite teams, so less actual contact there. But I was second base and whenever she was there she'd jokingly stick her tongue out at me or shove me or something. I kind of stopped caring about the space thing at this point. So then the event was done and Josh, me, and some other friends start kicking a ball around. So right as I'm passing to someone Hayley like jumps in front of me and pretty much tackles me, to an extent where we both went to the floor. There was some small talk there with my whole motive down the drain, and after a goodbye hug she's like," I'll call you, we should hang out." ------------ So I feel like I did my part and things worked out. Things were kind of awkward for the first 2-3 hours but that might've been because of me. I don't know. I just know by the end of the day things felt right. I think that she made it so clear that even a caveman could understand! Lol, it seems like she did everything but knock you out with a club and drag you back to her crib in the cave! ;D It reminds me of what Jayda said last time, " Don't believe what your friends told you, unless you hear it from Hayley's mouth!" This girl would not be doing all of these things unless she likes you.......or unless she is *crazy! Two years ago my friends and I knew this (crazy) girl that claimed that this one boy was stalking her and that she was going to turn him in. We warned the boy to stay away from her and he ignored her. We then noticed that she was constantly trying to get him to notice her to justify her claim, but he just continued to ignore her. This went on for about a month and this girl lost all creditability on who's stalking who!
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Post by hockeydude on Feb 22, 2010 17:39:16 GMT -5
Haha well she is pretty crazy. But I think you're right. There are some other factors, but whether she likes me or not I think I've been given the okay to be around her without worrying about it. I definitely intend to follow her up on our hanging out plans. And Michael, that's a possibility. Josh and his brother are in her ward and they're studs too (Josh especially. He'd make Taylor Lautner want to put his shirt back on). I'm glad to be friends with them though, like whatever happens she's not going to disrupt our friendship, but I feel like it's me or them. All I know is that avoiding her wasn't doing anything good. So I'll just have to see what this next encounter is like.
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Post by hockeydude on Feb 22, 2010 23:50:55 GMT -5
Visual, just because I was on Facebook and got bored. Very odd looking picture of me, camera angle or something, but that's me in the orange. I choose it because it does justice for everyone else. Josh in the grey. We're being losers and acting serious. Then Hayley in the green.
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Post by Michael on Feb 25, 2010 12:50:16 GMT -5
She looks nice.
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