Post by Michael on Jan 4, 2010 15:15:55 GMT -5
I don't really like how my life is right now.. sure there some nice things i'm doing like writing a book..
But i'm tried of feeling like a "outcast" Been like that when I fisrt made some friends in church when i was a little kid. theirs some guys my age at church that I talk to.. but not many.. and I only see them at church. only person I talk to and hang out like go to dances is Spencer. (Note. there's a topic I made called "Need true friends". say's some stuff about him)
Anyways.. it's like the 35 girls from efy yeah I still talk to them.. but I can't hang out with them cuz we met at efy we live to far away in WA, or they live in diff states.
Theres a dance coming up this saturday and i'm going cuz i love going to them.. probly will make some friends who are girls then I would say in a copule of weeks we will stop talking and.. we won't be friends anymore.
How can the ppl stop seeing me as the outside Mike and not the inside Mike?
There's very few ppl who even talk to me.. I mostly just made adult friends.. I went fishing with them in the summer last year and we talk at church with what's new. the guys my age very very few who talk to me. Hunter is just a nice person to everyone (Like me) he sang happy brithday to me at youth group once. theres Tucker who I don't really talk to but we talked on facebook once and he had to go and he said "I love you man" idk if he was just saying that.. or if he meant it.
At efy I meant two guys who live in town from me.. Kayleb go to the dances but Derrick doesn't. Kayleb was hosting a new year party.. and I wasn't invited.. Just like with EVERYTHING!. kids at church would even talk about parties that went to or will be going to (I don't care about their friends from school.. but from church)
I invited Aubrey to many things she went to one and it was a dance.. we hugged and talked. but the other 5 things she couldn't go.. she got home from Utah on one night and that was okay.. becuse she wasn't home.. but idk now if she jus making up stuff like "Sorry, I can't go. family is coming for dinner today. I tried but it wont work" How do I know if she was lying or not. if she's just like the rest. if she is.. fine then.. she will just be like the others. who I thought liked me cuz they came up and started talking. but no... no they just did it cuz they thought I was lonely? or something was wrong?. Well yeah.. one time something was wrong and I just sat by myself and of cousre guys from my ward came sat down, talked and then left. A girl came up and asked if i wanted to dance I said "Yeah, sure" cuz i know my night wasn't getting any better..
So we laughed, talked, she asked if I got a girlfriend.. I said "No" and she said "Ah, thats to bad your good looking" or she said cute.. but doesn't matter now she can't go to dances a lot she was 15 and only been to 2-3 dances. I forgot to ask for email or anything. We even liked a lot of the same stuff.
So yeah.. my life sucks
But i'm tried of feeling like a "outcast" Been like that when I fisrt made some friends in church when i was a little kid. theirs some guys my age at church that I talk to.. but not many.. and I only see them at church. only person I talk to and hang out like go to dances is Spencer. (Note. there's a topic I made called "Need true friends". say's some stuff about him)
Anyways.. it's like the 35 girls from efy yeah I still talk to them.. but I can't hang out with them cuz we met at efy we live to far away in WA, or they live in diff states.
Theres a dance coming up this saturday and i'm going cuz i love going to them.. probly will make some friends who are girls then I would say in a copule of weeks we will stop talking and.. we won't be friends anymore.
How can the ppl stop seeing me as the outside Mike and not the inside Mike?
There's very few ppl who even talk to me.. I mostly just made adult friends.. I went fishing with them in the summer last year and we talk at church with what's new. the guys my age very very few who talk to me. Hunter is just a nice person to everyone (Like me) he sang happy brithday to me at youth group once. theres Tucker who I don't really talk to but we talked on facebook once and he had to go and he said "I love you man" idk if he was just saying that.. or if he meant it.
At efy I meant two guys who live in town from me.. Kayleb go to the dances but Derrick doesn't. Kayleb was hosting a new year party.. and I wasn't invited.. Just like with EVERYTHING!. kids at church would even talk about parties that went to or will be going to (I don't care about their friends from school.. but from church)
I invited Aubrey to many things she went to one and it was a dance.. we hugged and talked. but the other 5 things she couldn't go.. she got home from Utah on one night and that was okay.. becuse she wasn't home.. but idk now if she jus making up stuff like "Sorry, I can't go. family is coming for dinner today. I tried but it wont work" How do I know if she was lying or not. if she's just like the rest. if she is.. fine then.. she will just be like the others. who I thought liked me cuz they came up and started talking. but no... no they just did it cuz they thought I was lonely? or something was wrong?. Well yeah.. one time something was wrong and I just sat by myself and of cousre guys from my ward came sat down, talked and then left. A girl came up and asked if i wanted to dance I said "Yeah, sure" cuz i know my night wasn't getting any better..
So we laughed, talked, she asked if I got a girlfriend.. I said "No" and she said "Ah, thats to bad your good looking" or she said cute.. but doesn't matter now she can't go to dances a lot she was 15 and only been to 2-3 dances. I forgot to ask for email or anything. We even liked a lot of the same stuff.
So yeah.. my life sucks